So after the term I’ve had and things I’ve experienced, as well as yet another piece of devastating news, I realised some of the serious dangers to mental health the university can cause and so I wanted to do a post to try and voice the issue.
When a lot of people experience mental health problems, a common feeling is loneliness and shame; feeling as though you’re not allowed to feel weak and sad because everyone else is coping just fine.
However, I’ve noticed this year, that there have been a lot of issues with mental health, not just at my university but among family and friends too, and this has devastatingly resulted in suicides. It’s extremely hard to attempt to help someone when they’re in that place, however we can do our very best to try to prevent it getting to that stage.
University is hard, and it’s different levels of hard for each individual depending on the subject, their work ethic, the way they deal with things and of course external and social influences. But it is hard. And yes it’s meant to be hard so that it’s worth more when you come out and yes I’ve definitely grown as a person and will be better equipped in the real world knowing I got through it. And don’t get me wrong, I don’t regret it – I’ve met some incredible people and am a stronger person because of it.
But I came pretty low this last term – I mean very low, too low in fact for it to be worth a ‘degree’ (oh and life long debt), and I’m evidently not the only one. Just looking around at my friends – not to mention hearing about other students from mine as well as other universities in England – I can feel the stress, despair and worry (and not going to lie we’re all pretty smart and hard working) and through meeting with a university counselor, they’ve been chocka-block all year with concerned students.
In my opinion, it’s a little bit too far. In some ways I think it’s good that young people can experience and learn to handle stress and a busy workload while they have the support easily accessible and ‘free’ (cough cough £9000 a year) so that they’re more prepared for the future. However, there’s a line. There’s a line where a degree, £27,000, relationships, bullying, body confidence etc etc IS NOT WORTH IT! And it seems that a lot of students either don’t want to or don’t know how to find the help they need and it all gets a bit much. And unfortunately crossing this line cannot be undone.
Universities have an obligation to their students to support them and unfortunately some of these support services are not well promoted or potentially not equipped enough to deal with the demand. Now I’m writing this post thinking, well there are plenty of support services at my uni, we’ve each got a subject supervisor who’s with us all throughout university and a project supervisor who’s meant to guide us through our dissertation project. But the thing is, being at a Russel Group University, everyone has their own research, i.e. they have their own work to do on top of, marking endless essays/exams, planning lectures, they’re own life. Everyone is stretched so thin that I have felt that I can’t go to these people when I need to, leaving me to deal with it on my own.
Mental Health and Mindfulness is becoming a new hot topic so I’m hoping that things will start to change and ideally become more relaxed and focused. Not only in universities but school as well, young people are so vulnerable and are learning new things everyday – we need the support of family and friends, who not everyone has support from making the support from the community/institution so much more important.
At the end of the day, a degree/exam is a piece of paper, it doesn’t not signify your worth. Nowadays there are plenty of opportunities for everyone. Nothing is worth ending your life for. Nothing.
If you’re feeling down or stressed and feeling like you’re not coping here’s what to do. First, don’t feel ashamed, we all (really, all of us!) go through it – I always thought university memes were a bit drastic, but nope we genuinely feel like that. Second, talk, it really does help, seek out what support your university/school provides (you should have a subject supervisor, of if you want more anonymity there may be counselors on site) and if they don’t – make it happen! Third, if there’s really no support, there’s services like The Samaritans that provide free counselling.
*Little disclaimer to point out that I didn’t personally know the people who have recently passed very well, and therefore don’t know the reasons for their actions. But simply based on their occurrence, mine and others experiences, I strongly feel that this is an issue that needs addressing urgently.